girl: trying blue lipstick today
thirty year old cis white male .social user: Oh, um... That's certainly interesting! I definitely prefer red lipstick, though. When a woman is aroused, her lips flush red, so red lipstick is a great aide in making you appear fertile.
i know this is a strawman that i invented but reading this makes me want to put on my blue lipstick
girl: just got out of the shower
man: Ahhh the scent of a freshly cleaned woman... I knew it well before Debra left me
*Straps men like that onto a rocket and launches them into the sun*
me: sees all of this and just fucking stares while doing my best not to rupture too many organs due to restraining infernal laughter. awkward infernal laughter.
@lynnesbian do itttt
Blue lipstick is amazing, you should rock it.
@lynnesbian ive had someone say this to me almost verbatim at work once
@MegaLobsterFace consider moving to a different planet to get away from this person
@lynnesbian seriously, though, i wasnt even wearing a weird color, iirc i wasnt wearing lipstick at all, dude just unprompted told me i should wear red more bc it makes girls look turned on
anyway that dude was a regular and i came in for a week after that w/ black lipstick
@MegaLobsterFace why are men
@lynnesbian i think if someone tries to come up w/ an extreme edge-case to demonstrate a point and someone can come forward w/ that exact scenario having happened to them, everyone involved should win a free pizza
@lynnesbian lynne this format is for jokes not anecdotes
@lynnesbian oh um, that's certainly interesting! i definitely prefer eybrowns tho
when a woman is aroused, her eybrowns sweat, so having eybrowns is a great aide in making you appear fertile
@lynnesbian lynne.im love 💖
@foggy i actually was referencing JP and i'm glad you noticed ;p
@lynnesbian what do they say about black lipstick?
@lynnesbian Oh, um... That’s certainly interesting! I definitely prefer actual blood though. When a predator is feasting, their lips drip with the remnants of their most recent kill, so actual blood is a great aide in making you appear dangerous.
@email@example.com's anti-chud pro-skub instance for funtimes