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a bot that scans every single post on the fediverse looking for anything it believes to be a measurement in imperial units and replies with the metric equivalent

terrible bot ideas 

a bot that watches for grammatical errors and replies with corrections

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terrible bot ideas 

a bot that DMs you if you post an image that doesn't have a web safe colour palette

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terrible bot ideas 

a bot that allows you to DM every known fediverse user with a single command

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terrible bot ideas 

a bot that tries to log in to every fedi account it sees with the 1 million most common passwords, and if it gets in, makes a post from their account saying "whoops! i need to get better at cybersecurity!"

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terrible bot ideas 

a bot that sends a thank you message if you favourite any of its posts

this one actually exists, it's some cat facts bot or something

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terrible bot ideas 

a bot that mass DMs every known instance admin with block recommendations for accounts that break these rules:

. name must not contain a swear word (e.g. "[shit]lover", "cl[ass]icposts")
. profile pic must not get a 50% or higher match for nudity from that one porn neural net
. user must have posted at least once in the past 7 days

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terrible bot ideas 

a bot that tries the 1 million most common passwords on your account. if it gets in, it deletes all your DMs to protect your privacy

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terrible bot ideas 

a bot that DMs you hourly with a list of typos in your posts. you can only get it to stop by deleting all posts with typos

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terrible bot ideas 

a bot that runs sentiment analysis every post it sees and creates a weekly leaderboard of the most depressed people

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terrible bot ideas 

a bot that advertises itself as providing some useful function. when given access to your account, it makes a public post recommending itself, and DMs all your mufos about itself. the bot constantly adds more access tokens for itself, meaning you'd have to revoke thousands of tokens to get it to stop. three months after the first "infected" user, it deletes all accounts associated with it, and writes an article on medium.com about how it was a harmless lesson in infosec

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terrible bot ideas 

this last one is just a 90's style worm but modernised

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re: terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian
A bot that watches for correct grammar and replies with "corrections"

Eg recommending using they're in place of a correctly used their

terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian oh this one is evil

re: terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian the only safe website is grace's christian server

re: terrible bot ideas 

@KitRedgrave @lynnesbian i wouldn't be so sure about that honestly

selfdep, re: terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian ooh! high score!!

re: terrible bot ideas 

@monorail @lynnesbian making four bots with slightly different levels of depression to make the leaderboard say "i got dookie butt"

terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian yeah you could have told me this happened already and i would have believed you

re: terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian i interpreted this as "deletes the accounts of users who got infected" and i'm still not sure that's not what you meant

re: terrible bot ideas 

@zoe it is

i was originally gonna say "publishes their DMs" or something but i didn't wanna be too mean

re: terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian that's a clbuttic

re: terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian

a bot that watches for GW2-related posts and replies with @ben and no other context

terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian there are a couple on twitter. Of course.

terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian on that one bad website, there was a bot account called "Stealth Mountain" which would search for people using the exact phrase "sneak peak" and reply "I think you mean 'sneak peek'" and the bot's author would favorite all the angry replies it got

terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian
Then there will be a bot made to mock this bot, then this bot will start to reply to the mockery, then the mocking bot will reply to that reply mocking it again,

Wait a minute is fediverse turning into reddit?

terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian this is a thing on*wretches* reddit. there are also (obviously) like several chains of bots that reply to eachother replying to the grammar bot

terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian

Could we have one that converts all inferior base 10 notation to superior base 6?

re: terrible bot ideas 

@endomain @lynnesbian
okay but machine code is hexadecimal so it's more practical to do hexadecimal for when we are eventually ruled by a supreme AI and it's robot army

re: terrible bot ideas 

@aCuteLittleBox

@lynnesbian

In this fine day in 13203/05/45, I declare it the day of the 10!

terrible bot ideas 

@endomain @lynnesbian ITYM convert inferior base 14

*hides*

re: terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian this exists on twitter, and you don't have to be following or be followed by it

re: terrible bot ideas 

@lynnesbian I had that on IRC back when I was a fansubber. It was a script for my IRC client so people couldn’t just block the bot because, obnoxious as that was, what I wrote mattered enough for them to fix their grammar/spelling instead.

@lynnesbian this bot is called people that already exist and mock me for not using metric when all of my tools arent metric because fuck me for buying second hand tools what a proletarian fucking thing to do

@lynnesbian This sounds so fantastically annoying that I'm in love with the idea.😂

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